The Shoes I Almost Threw Away

Photo by Fachry Zella Devandra on Unsplash

I have a favorite pair of sneakers, a set of Vans, that I wear all the time. They are perfectly worn in and very comfortable. I love these sneakers and yet I almost threw them out.

You see they were a gift from the company that laid me off. When this happened to me years ago, I was so overwhelmed with shock and frustration that I wanted to chuck everything they had given me. In fact, when I sent back my laptop, I used all the t-shirts they had given me as packing material (true story). A little passive aggressive, yes, but very satisfying. When I was going through the purge, I almost added these shoes, but they weren't just stupid t-shirts, they were shoes that I really liked. So I reluctantly held onto them by reminding myself that even though I was upset, even though I thought they handled the layoffs terribly, there were still good things that came from working there: I made friends that I still have, colleagues who I followed to other companies, skills that I've been able to build on, and lessons that will last a lifetime.

A few months ago, I had the pleasure of getting to see Cori Close speak, head coach of the UCLA Bruins. She talked about training ourselves to strengthen our responses to events, because the event is not the outcome; the outcome is the event plus how we respond to the event.

Event + Response = Outcome

So, I kept the Vans. Not as a symbol of the company, but as a reminder of my response: of the friendships I chose to nurture, the skills I chose to sharpen, the dignity I chose to maintain—even when the situation didn’t offer much of it. These sneakers have walked me through uncertainty, reinvention, and growth. They’ve become a quiet testament to resilience, not revenge.

We don’t always get to choose the events, but we always get to choose what we carry forward—and what we leave behind. And sometimes, what we carry looks like a scuffed-up pair of shoes that still fit just right. Because the real gift wasn’t the sneakers. it was learning how to lace up and keep going.